FREE KRAUT! » The End is Near; or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Make the Sign

The End is Near; or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Make the Sign

Leopold Bloom posted this in Conversation starter on February 6th, 2010

Pick Three.  Do it.  Tell us what your three are…

Original post here.

So, of the originals, I got voices for:

1.  A slap of awesome upside your head.

2.  My city can beat up your city.

3.  Face it NY & Boston, America hates you.

4.  Underdog.

Others added:

1.  Take my ballpark…please.

2.  I got your hidden value right here.

3.  Show me the Moneyball

4.  Standing on the territory of Giants.

5.  Fuck Dionne Warwick.

6.  Moneyball does not mean what you think it means.

7.  Black cleats are for losers.

8.  We root for laundry…and loose change in the sofa.

9.  We excel on the DL

10.  We excel on paper.

11.  We excel in your mom’s basement

12.  Keep our kraut free.

13.  It started at Saag’s.

14. The FK oval, which I have yet to design.

Again, pick three.  I redesign.  I print.  I ship.  Feel the FK love.

February 6th, 2010 | Tags: , , | Category: Conversation starter | 64 comments

64 comments to The End is Near; or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Make the Sign

  • nanotrebuchet

    Moneyball does not mean what you think it means.

    Black cleats are for losers.

    The FK oval, which I have yet to design.

    by salb918 on February 6, 2010 at 11:28 am
  • mjdittmer

    Show me the moneyball
    Keep our kraut free
    The FK oval

    I can feel the FK love and the LB love … love it.

    by mjdittmer on February 6, 2010 at 12:01 pm
  • FreeSeatUpgrade

    First of all, excellent post title.

    Also, me and my sock puppet like these six the best:

    A slap of awesome upside your head.
    My city can beat up your city.
    Black cleats are for losers.
    The FK oval.
    Careful. You don’t know where that team’s been.
    The official team of Al Swearengen

    "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
    by FreeSeatUpgrade on February 6, 2010 at 12:23 pm
  • andeux

    Take my ballpark … please
    Keep our kraut free
    FK oval

    (Possible variant of #10, which I don’t actually want: We excel in Excel.)

    TINSTAAFK
    by andeux on February 6, 2010 at 12:49 pm
  • whiteshoes40

    Winner: Black cleats are for losers.

    Runners-up: Show me the Moneyball.
    A slap of awesome upside your head.

    by whiteshoes40 on February 6, 2010 at 1:03 pm
  • batgirl

    Black cleats…

    Face it NY…

    My City can beat up…

    by batgirl on February 6, 2010 at 1:24 pm
  • dmoas

    We root for laundry…and loose change in the sofa.
    We excel on the DL
    A slap of awesome upside your head.

    by dmoas on February 6, 2010 at 1:34 pm
    dmoas
      up

    I like these better from the original:
    Did you root for Mr. Potter in It’s a Wonderful Life? No? Then why you rotting for his baseball equivalent?
    Put your hands up and step away from the high-priced free agent.
    We’re the team your mother warned you about.
    Careful. You don’t know where that team’s been.

    by dmoas on February 6, 2010 at 1:39 pm
  • nevermoor

    6. Moneyball does not mean what you think it means.

    7. Black cleats are for losers.

    14. The FK oval, which I have yet to design. (with the text = It started at Saag’s.)

    And yes, I shamelessly voted for mine.

    "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
    by nevermoor on February 6, 2010 at 1:54 pm
  • mikeA

    12, 14, 7

    See you in the Value Deck
    by mikeA on February 6, 2010 at 2:13 pm
    JediLeroy
      up

    What mikeA said.

    Also, I’ll see if I can’t find my FK graphic today.

    az di bobe volt gehat beytsim volt zi geven mayn zeyde
    by JediLeroy on February 6, 2010 at 3:13 pm
    JediLeroy
      up

    Must’ve lost it in my last reformat.

    az di bobe volt gehat beytsim volt zi geven mayn zeyde
    by JediLeroy on February 6, 2010 at 3:18 pm
  • ptbnl

    1, 4, 6, 8 & have “We’re not in Philadelphia Kansas Oakland any more” ready to go :-(

    If this is His will, He is a son of a bitch.
    by green star oakland on February 6, 2010 at 2:36 pm
    monkeyball
      up

    ” … Oakland Fremont …”

    It’s simply impossible for me to ‘belong’ to this quarrelsome, hostile, disputatious, and deservedly infamous group.
    by monkeyball on February 6, 2010 at 11:58 pm
  • Ice Cream

    4, 8, 10.

    How can there be any "sin" in sincere?
    by Ice Cream on February 6, 2010 at 4:51 pm
  • Poppy

    A slap of awesome…

    Black cleats…

    the FK oval

    (and I also liked “Careful, you don’t know where that team’s been”)

    sorry but i have no suits. i dont think anyone ever did.
    by Poppy on February 6, 2010 at 7:29 pm
    Leopold Bloom
      up

    stay away from game shows.

    I caught my second wife screwing my step-dad. It's a cruel world, Walt. -Saul Goodman
    by Leopold Bloom on February 6, 2010 at 7:55 pm
    dmoas
      up

    How about a wheel of fortune wheel but instead of money, it shows the possible locations the A’s could go to and the little ticker thing is on Bankrupt or Lose A Turn.
    OR
    How about a wheel of fortune wheel with the 3 true outcomes: Win, Lose, and Day-to-Day.

    by dmoas on February 7, 2010 at 1:04 am
  • Leopold Bloom

    Well, fuckers, I guess I should get mailing addresses from you if I’m gonna make and send you these.

    email me, I suppose. Urf4 at the yahoo. Name’s Russ, if you don’t know. And I make signs in Florida.

    Yay.

    I caught my second wife screwing my step-dad. It's a cruel world, Walt. -Saul Goodman
    by Leopold Bloom on February 7, 2010 at 1:35 am
    nevermoor
      up

    And you’re awesome.

    "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
    by nevermoor on February 7, 2010 at 9:14 am
    nanotrebuchet
      up

    I feel uncomfortable telling you where I live. Can we arrange a drop-off by the river?

    by salb918 on February 7, 2010 at 9:56 am
    andeux
      up

    Yeah, this all seems like a good idea until Leo and his 37 boxes of books show up on your doorstep one day.

    TINSTAAFK
    by andeux on February 7, 2010 at 10:53 am
    ptbnl
      up

    June 16th, to be precise.

    If this is His will, He is a son of a bitch.
    by green star oakland on February 7, 2010 at 11:12 am
    Leopold Bloom
      up

    That would be so cool. Do the A’s have a home game that day?

    I caught my second wife screwing my step-dad. It's a cruel world, Walt. -Saul Goodman
    by Leopold Bloom on February 7, 2010 at 11:15 am
    Leopold Bloom
      up

    …at Chicago. Bummer.

    I caught my second wife screwing my step-dad. It's a cruel world, Walt. -Saul Goodman
    by Leopold Bloom on February 7, 2010 at 11:16 am
    Poppy
      up

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZsTTvKWPZGw&feature=related

    sorry but i have no suits. i dont think anyone ever did.
    by Poppy on February 7, 2010 at 12:42 pm
    Leopold Bloom
      up

    I’m (almost) 40, but it’s no less apropos.

    I caught my second wife screwing my step-dad. It's a cruel world, Walt. -Saul Goodman
    by Leopold Bloom on February 7, 2010 at 12:45 pm
  • Leopold Bloom

    I’ve got thirteen takers here and two addresses.

    1. I am not a stalker.
    2. Even if I was a stalker, I live 3,000 miles away.
    3. Even if I lived next door, this would be the lamest attempt ever to get your info.

    I caught my second wife screwing my step-dad. It's a cruel world, Walt. -Saul Goodman
    by Leopold Bloom on February 7, 2010 at 7:14 pm
    JediLeroy
      up

    1. Dang, I guess giving you my address was pointless, then

    az di bobe volt gehat beytsim volt zi geven mayn zeyde
    by JediLeroy on February 7, 2010 at 7:30 pm
    Leopold Bloom
      up

    You, I’ll stalk.

    You’re on another continent, though.

    I caught my second wife screwing my step-dad. It's a cruel world, Walt. -Saul Goodman
    by Leopold Bloom on February 7, 2010 at 7:35 pm
    Poppy
      up

    I’m sorry… I’m an airhead. Sending email now!

    sorry but i have no suits. i dont think anyone ever did.
    by Poppy on February 8, 2010 at 4:19 pm
  • 5Aces

    6,7,and 14.

    Address on its way today. Sorry for the delay.

    by 5Aces on February 9, 2010 at 6:48 am
  • monkeyball

    I’ll take a stack of FK ovals. You still have my work addy?

    It’s simply impossible for me to ‘belong’ to this quarrelsome, hostile, disputatious, and deservedly infamous group.
    by monkeyball on February 9, 2010 at 8:29 am
    monkeyball
      up

    Oh, and you know what? If you haven’t printed them already, we really should add the URL along the bottom of the oval.

    It’s simply impossible for me to ‘belong’ to this quarrelsome, hostile, disputatious, and deservedly infamous group.
    by monkeyball on February 9, 2010 at 8:29 am
    nevermoor
      up

    I like it.

    "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
    by nevermoor on February 9, 2010 at 8:45 am
    Leopold Bloom
      up

    I hate you all.

    die.

    die.

    die.

    No problem.

    Normally, I just say the first four lines inside.

    I caught my second wife screwing my step-dad. It's a cruel world, Walt. -Saul Goodman
    by Leopold Bloom on February 9, 2010 at 4:43 pm
    Leopold Bloom
      up

    can someone give me a model or something of what we’re shooting for? I thought i knew, but it turns out I was thinking of Lone Stranger’s avatar.

    I caught my second wife screwing my step-dad. It's a cruel world, Walt. -Saul Goodman
    by Leopold Bloom on February 9, 2010 at 4:44 pm
    monkeyball
      up

    Google-image “country code oval sticker.” Then mod it to JL’s green & yellow nav icon — green ring around the outside instead of black, yellow ground instead of white. Run a “www.freekraut.com” in small green type curving just above the bottom, inside the oval.

    And get me a cheeseburger. Niman ranch, medium-rare, Maytag bleu.

    It’s simply impossible for me to ‘belong’ to this quarrelsome, hostile, disputatious, and deservedly infamous group.
    by monkeyball on February 9, 2010 at 5:02 pm
    nevermoor
      up

    I still think the top should say “It started at Saags” but that’s because I’m flogging my traction-less ideas

    "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
    by nevermoor on February 9, 2010 at 5:22 pm
    monkeyball
      up

    I have no objection to that on a sticker on its own, but the oval should be as clean as possible.

    It’s simply impossible for me to ‘belong’ to this quarrelsome, hostile, disputatious, and deservedly infamous group.
    by monkeyball on February 9, 2010 at 5:37 pm
    JediLeroy
      up

    I made one up today and sent the illustrator file to LB’s Yahoo mail. Whaddya think?

    Right click–>view image for a higher-res pic.

    The original doesn’t do the weird two-shade thing on the yellow background. It’s all like the outside.

    az di bobe volt gehat beytsim volt zi geven mayn zeyde
    by JediLeroy on February 10, 2010 at 2:02 am
    Leopold Bloom
      up

    I made a slight change…to A’s colors…I REALLY appreciate JL for designing this.

    I caught my second wife screwing my step-dad. It's a cruel world, Walt. -Saul Goodman
    by Leopold Bloom on February 10, 2010 at 8:22 am
    nevermoor
      up

    Are the black lines in the green oval intentional? Web-produced errors? Something else? They look like grid lines.

    "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
    by nevermoor on February 10, 2010 at 8:44 am
    nevermoor
      up

    Also, me wantee.

    "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
    by nevermoor on February 10, 2010 at 8:44 am
    FreeSeatUpgrade
      up

    Me too. More than one. I have three cars and two laptops, and that doesn’t even count all the public property I’d like to deface.

    "Kraut will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no kraut."
    by FreeSeatUpgrade on February 10, 2010 at 8:59 am
    nanotrebuchet
      up

    stop signs all over Oakland…

    by salb918 on February 10, 2010 at 9:33 am
    batgirl
      up

    Me three.

    by batgirl on February 10, 2010 at 10:33 am
    Poppy
      up

    Wooooooooooo!

    (and yes, needs exclamation mark after FREE KRAUT)

    How involved would it be to make it one of those static plastic things? Although sticker is fine if static can’t be done — I can use tape… :)

    sorry but i have no suits. i dont think anyone ever did.
    by Poppy on February 10, 2010 at 9:22 am
    monkeyball
      up

    You know what would also be cool? A big yellow “TU” oval, with tiny type at the bottom: TROUGH URINALS!

    It’s simply impossible for me to ‘belong’ to this quarrelsome, hostile, disputatious, and deservedly infamous group.
    by monkeyball on February 10, 2010 at 12:55 pm
    JediLeroy
      up

    I like. Also, feel free to add an exclamation point.

    az di bobe volt gehat beytsim volt zi geven mayn zeyde
    by JediLeroy on February 10, 2010 at 4:32 pm
    monkeyball
      up

    To “FREE KRAUT”, not “FK”, that is.

    It’s simply impossible for me to ‘belong’ to this quarrelsome, hostile, disputatious, and deservedly infamous group.
    by monkeyball on February 10, 2010 at 4:58 pm
    nevermoor
      up

    Oh. That would be fine with me. FK! would be too much.

    "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
    by nevermoor on February 10, 2010 at 5:58 pm
    monkeyball
      up

    RIGHT!

    I was unclear below — I meant that FREE KRAUT! needs the exclamation point. No one wants it on the acro.

    It’s simply impossible for me to ‘belong’ to this quarrelsome, hostile, disputatious, and deservedly infamous group.
    by monkeyball on February 10, 2010 at 6:13 pm
    monkeyball
      up

    No exclamation point!

    It’s simply impossible for me to ‘belong’ to this quarrelsome, hostile, disputatious, and deservedly infamous group.
    by monkeyball on February 10, 2010 at 9:08 am
    nevermoor
      up

    CONCUR!

    "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want"
    by nevermoor on February 10, 2010 at 11:30 am
    Leopold Bloom
      up

    I am not a fan.

    I caught my second wife screwing my step-dad. It's a cruel world, Walt. -Saul Goodman
    by Leopold Bloom on February 10, 2010 at 5:10 pm
    nanotrebuchet
      up

    the.
    the.
    the.

    (translated from german)

    by salb918 on February 9, 2010 at 4:59 pm
    monkeyball
      up

    Oh, no one who speaks German can be bad!

    It’s simply impossible for me to ‘belong’ to this quarrelsome, hostile, disputatious, and deservedly infamous group.
    by monkeyball on February 9, 2010 at 5:03 pm
    Leopold Bloom
      up

    I love this place.

    I caught my second wife screwing my step-dad. It's a cruel world, Walt. -Saul Goodman
    by Leopold Bloom on February 9, 2010 at 5:06 pm
    Leopold Bloom
      up

    …although it is disheartening to realize I’m the Phil Laak of FK.

    I caught my second wife screwing my step-dad. It's a cruel world, Walt. -Saul Goodman
    by Leopold Bloom on February 9, 2010 at 5:06 pm
    monkeyball
      up

    Dude. There are worse things to be.

    It’s simply impossible for me to ‘belong’ to this quarrelsome, hostile, disputatious, and deservedly infamous group.
    by monkeyball on February 9, 2010 at 5:18 pm
    monkeyball
      up

    Although now that I look more closely at that photo, I have a sneaking suspicion that FSU may actually be the Phil Laak of Phil Laak’s world.

    It’s simply impossible for me to ‘belong’ to this quarrelsome, hostile, disputatious, and deservedly infamous group.
    by monkeyball on February 9, 2010 at 5:21 pm
    ptbnl
      up

    You mean apart from the money, actress-girlfriend, and homes in LA and LV?

    If this is His will, He is a son of a bitch.
    by green star oakland on February 9, 2010 at 5:22 pm
    Leopold Bloom
      up

    yeah, I said of FK, you know. Not like there’s tons of “winners” here.

    I caught my second wife screwing my step-dad. It's a cruel world, Walt. -Saul Goodman
    by Leopold Bloom on February 9, 2010 at 5:34 pm

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